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Not I, but Christ

16 Jul

I threw myself to the bed at the end of the day. I was exhausted physically and emotionally. I asked myself, “Is it worth it?”

I had to finish two papers, prepare for a debate, a report and make much much research but I can’t start working on any of them because I need to meet someone who needs me. Three hours passed before I got to go home. I prayed, “Lord, is it worth it?”

Early this year, I realized I don’t really know how and what love is. I wanted to know what love is and I want to know how to love. So, where else should I turn to but to the God who is love? I prayed to God that He will teach me. I prayed that He will teach me to love like He does and so He did. He taught me not only through the Bible but as He teaches me through His Word, He also put me through everyday circumstances where I can practice what I learn.

The process is enlightening but it is also painful. I didn’t only learn what love is but I also learned about relationships, priorities, motives, words and actions. So far, the most difficult thing about love is sacrifice. There are times when sacrifices are worth it. It’s those time when I enjoyed the fellowship or when God replaces what I lost with something better.

However, that is not always the case. Lately, I asked God and myself if my sacrifice and suffering are worth it. Then I saw this verse, “I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God who loved me and gave himself for me (Gal. 2:20).”

I asked myself “Is it worth it?” I’ve forgotten. This is not for me and this is not about me. This life I live, I live in Christ. I may lose this life but I’ have eternal life. So I pray that I’ll be a bridge of His blessings, love and His grace. I’ll pray that my hands will always be open to receive and give what God gives me. And when this life comes to its end, I’ll go home to God’s embrace and enjoy Him forever.  Will it be worth it? A thousand times YES! ^_^

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Someday Soon . . . but not very soon :D

23 Apr

a song for my future husband..

by Francesca Battistelli

Someday Soon – lyrics

I wanna be the one who knows everything about you
I wanna be the one who’s always on your mind
I wanna be the one to get all of your affection and attention
You’re the one that I’ve been waiting for, for all this time

And I can’t imagine anything, anything better than

(Chorus)
Someday falling in love with you
Holding your hand
Making our plans all come true
Someday under a sky so blue
I’ll give you my heart
Our story will start
Someday soon

I wanna be the one who does everything with you
Watching stars, washing cars, taking walks, going to the store
I wanna be the one who gets to change her last name someday
To something that sounds something more like yours

(Chorus)

Yeah I’ll be telling you I love you
On a picture perfect day
And those words inside my head
They sound like angels singing praise
It’s what I was made to say

(Chorus)

How do I love Thee?

24 Feb

How do I love Thee?

Lord, let me count the ways.

Nothing compares to Your silent presence

in the early mornings.

Nothing compares to Your silent whispers of love

and reminders of Your blessings.

Nothing compares to Your clear messages

when I am confused and afraid.

Nothing compares to Your comfort

when I’m hurting and in need.

Who am I to enjoy and receive the blue sky,

the airplanes passing by,

the fresh breeze of the early morning,

the sunlight on the trees burning?

When all is said and done,

I can only think of His Son.

And say, I can only love You, Lord,

and be thankful to Thee

because it’s You who first loved me.

– a poem I made when thinking about how much God loved me. The things we do for love. 😀